secrets revealed.. =p

By secrets I meant those skeletons we hide in our closets. And today I've discovered lots of them. And of course, I've revealed a secret or two.

My first secret wasn't actually revealed by me, and I had no plans on telling the others about it. It is all John's fault. Break time, we ate at Wendy's and the "laglagan" session begun. John started with me. Actually, what he told everybody was not a secret to most, if not all of us anymore. But that specific someone who is there that shouldn't be there. And if there is one person who should not know my secret, it is..err.. that person..(redundant, eh?). But knowing John, though I kicked him secretly, it didn't stopped him from letting my skeleton out from the closet. Then, there was JR's secret and the others, which I wont tell you because though we know it, it is still a secret.=p..

But the revealing of secrets did not stopped there. We went back to eng'g for our IM152 subject. Ms. Jaucian isn't around but she left us a seatwork. While the others are busy answering the seatwork. John, Dash and me extended our bonding moments from Wendy's to the room. And more secrets we're revealed, and my initial reaction was, "bakit?", I dont know why, but that is the very first thing that popped into my mind when... (can't tell you more..=p)..

After IM152 is IT102, Mrs. Lacsamana was absent so our classmates went home. The only ones that are left in the room were John, Dash, me, MJ, Jhapi(who are still on bonding mode). We were talking and laughing together when JR called and told us that Ma'am Lacsamana is on her way up and that we should leave the room immediately. Hala, It was so funny. We were running and hiding like criminals, peeping into corridors just to avoid being seen by Ma'am Lacsamana. After that, we met up with Jamie then we went to Dash's house. It was my first time going to their house. It was so nice and cozy. We did nothing there but laugh and check out boys from friendster and catch up with Jamie's life.. =p.. I got home at around 8:30.. Buti na lang inde ako pinagalitan ni daddy..=)

Here are some of the pictures we took at Dash's house:

Top: MJ, Jamie
Jhapi, Dash, Me and John



This is wacky..=p.. or supposed to be..






ASAN C JOHN???



Really had fun today..=).. Nothing really beats bonding moments with your closest friends..

my head is pounding..

Just woke up, *yawn* yet I'm still sleepy. I went to 168 today with my dad, he ask me to go with him there because he wants to buy a pirated complete copy of Jewel in the Palace (addict!)=p.. Earlier this day, I was in school together with my CWTS classmates, we were or rather they were composing an environmental song for our upcoming concert for a cause, while Jhapi, Kevs and I were doing absolutely nothing. Can you believe that, we'll be having a concert for a cause as a part of our activity in CWTS, we will be singing in front of a big crowd and we will be embarassing ourselves. Oh, this is going to be very exciting(sarcastic).

I miss my friends, especially my HS friends. I'm getting bored with college life. It's not as fun as I use to think it is. Yes, I'm having fun, but not that fun kind of fun anymore. Do you get what I mean? I'm having fun, but there's always something missing. I can't seem to get contented, It's as if I always wanted to do something else. Am I making any sense? I guess I'm just losing it.=(

Last week, I was with my college friends. Doing the usual, eating lunch together, talking, kidding around, doing nothing else except what we always do. It was fun. I was having fun, but I dont know why but it still wasn't enough.

Maybe I'm getting a little homesick for highschool. I'm missing my old ways. Maybe I'm looking for something that isn't there, maybe I really have to face the fact that college isn't highschool and I'm not in highschool anymore. I don't know what to do with my life anymore. I'm messing it up and I don't know how to fix it. I feel miserable. I can't seem to do anything right. Waah.. What should I do?

Well, I'm currently talking to Marj now. As in NOW. So I just have to cut my rantings short. Till next time..=)

Let this be a joke..

I didn't go to school today because I'm not feeling well. Well, JR called and told me what happened while I was not around. It seems that they had just checked the test papers in English and IT102. My results in english were satisfactory, atleast I got 70++ out of 90. And I was very happy with it knowing that I did not studied for that subject. But I cannot say that the feeling is mutual for IT102. JR told me that I got a 'very' low score and I was very disappointed. I studied all night for that subject and I dont deserve whatever I got. JR told me that that she did not really saw my paper, just got a glimpse of it and she was not sure whether or not she saw it right. But i dont put on my hopes too high. Damn! I dont know what to do. I dont know if I can pull up my grades in the finals. I dont want to fail. I really dont know what to do. Its okay if I did not study but I did. Waah, tonight I am slightly hysterical, tomorrow I might be suicidal.='(..
Oh God, please help me. I cannot do this, I wish and hope I could. Help me get through this. ='(.

freaky..

MOOD: oh! sad daY!!='(

Just as I was to conclude that this day was a happy day, something rather someone just have to ruin it, ne? Really freaky, ne?

TO YOU: I'm not stupid, I just pretend to be because I dont want to hurt myself. But, why oh why do you have to do it over and over again? I'm not dumb, I can see what you are doing. Im not made of glass that easily breaks nor im made of steel that is always strong. I have my weak points, but you can never break me by just doing that. But please stop! You'll be hurting yourself too, if you don't stop.

I really cant understand this feeling that is why I cant cope up with it. I am no martyr. Heck! I don't want to waste another six years just to wait for somebody to make up his mind. I just did it with 'frangab' because I was too young then. I was naive and hopelessly obsessed with him. But I cannot do it again. 'frangab' was a different story. I was obsessed with him, and I was hoping that somehow (though he doesn't know me at all), he'll knocked his head hard and voila! he'll just wake up deeply, madly in love with me. And that is what you call a fairytale.

But then, 'ryoi-chan' is another story. You cant keep doing this to me. As I've told you before, I am free. I can never held nor caged. I will always be free.

I dont really understand why most people think that they can catch a butterfly and then expect it to stay where they leave it, especially when they neglect it. Butterflies are meant to fly, fly away with the wind. And not to be left alone in a leaf, not to wait for the someone who dare catch it but leave it. I am not a demanding person, I have few things which I fear and they are:
> frogs
> ghosts
> heights
> mascots
> and of growing old alone..='(

are my fears too many or too great that is why people cant keep them in mind? Waah! Always hated this feeling. I dont want to go back to my old hypocritical self(tama ba?), I dont want to act like a child anymore just to mask what I truly feel. I'm a grown up now so I have to act like one. I dont want slip back to my old comfort shell and shy away from reality. I really hate this.

TO YOU: If ever you're reading this. Please, dont compare yourself to 'frangab' especially to 'knivel'. They are nothing compared to you, at least know that. You've caught the butterfly, you cant put it in a cage but at least hold on to it. But, not too tight just enough to let it know that you are not planning to let it go and still you want it to be free. Talk to me ryoi-chan, dont do this just to retaliate. Please dont. I didn't gave you that paper not because you are not dear to me, God knows how special you are to me. I did not gave it to you because I dont hold. We are both free, remember? PLease, you're very dear to me ryoi-chan so please dont do this. Stop it! I love you.. I really do.. Trust me.. please..='(..

Crazy schoolgirl, eh?

You're a crazy school girl. Clumsy, crazy, wierd, and even annoying is what they think of you as. You're very pretty but very clumsy too. You seem to always make an accident and cause trouble but don't worry, they still love you.

Final GK day!

Atlast! Today was our final day at the GK site in Tandang Sora.

We needed to be at the site at "exactly" 8am. So I woke up at around 6:30am, I finished preparing by 7 and left the house. And oh, have I told you that I was in my mom's house in Bulacan.=)..
I was supposed to meet Jhapi, Ayna and Lolo in McDonald's Mindanao avenue, at about 7am. But knowing Lolo, I assumed that he would be late. And i was right, he texted me at around 7:15 and said that he would be late because he is just leaving the house. If we want, we could leave him and go straight to the GK site. But I told him that I myself is just leaving the house so I would be late too and we'll just wait for him. And because I'll be coming from Bulacan and he will be from somewhere in qc, I thought that for the first time, he'll be there at the meeting place before I arrive. But how wrong I was. When I arrived at Mcdonald's it was already past 8. BUt he still wasn't there. Only Jhapi was there and I also saw Jermin and Marc. As it was our last day in the GK site, it would be their(Marc and Jermin's) first. They just ordered a take-out because they were required to bring packed lunch.
Jhapi was eating pancakes when I saw him and then I had this sudden craving for pancakes too, so I ordered some for myself. Ayna came after I finished eating my pancakes, still, there is no Lolo. So, I called him and asked him where he was. I told him that I thought he'd be there earlier because we just came out of the house at the same time and I came from Bulacan. Sabe ba naman niya, "Papunta na ako. Dito na ako west ave.".. Could you please tell me how far is West ave from their house and an hour passed before he reached that place? Well, It was Lolo we're talking about anyway.
So, even in our last day we are late. But its okay, we didn't do anything because too many people is already at the site and there's nothing much to do anymore unlike the last weeks.
After that, we went to SM north to have our lunch at Kenny Roger's then we watched "Ako Legal Wife". I really wanted to see that since MMFF opened but I had no time, finally i saw it! It was funny, especially Zsazsa. I think she deserved the award for Best Actress in her perfomance in that movie. (she won best actress, right?) Then we waited for Alu, and Ralph and then we went home. Well, only Ayna and me went home together. Ralph met with her mom at SM north and Lolo and Alu took the fx.
It was a tiring day and Im super sleepy now. But it's okay. I was happy naman.

MOOD:
"OH HAPPY DAY!"=)

hell week's over! at last!

Just finished my last two exams today. Whew! Thank God, its done. And compared to the other exam days, I did better today, I just wish I did my best..='(..
I screwed up in most of my exams, if not all of them='(. But I think I did well in English. And maybe in accounting and IT103. I know it was my fault, I did not study enough. I mean, I did not study at all. Just browse through my notes and voila! its sleeping time fo me. Promise, I'll try to do better in the finals and focus more on my studies. I dont want to fail any of my subjects, that's just do unacceptable.
Anyway, after the exams. John and I wento to 168. Wala lang, nagpasama lang si John. He was going to attend debut later this day, eh gusto niya mag-iraon ng buhok, malandin lalake. So, he bought an hair iron there. Mas mura nga naman. Sandali lang kame, I have to go home early because I'll be going to Bulacan at ihahatid ako ni daddy.
Wala lang, just fell like celebrating kase at last, examinations week is over. And I still have two days before I see failing marks in my test papers. Kaya hangga't may oras! Be happy! Because I know, after Hell week, judgment week follows..='(..
Do you think I'll fail my exams?? Do you??

GK pictures!!

wala ako magawa, just going to post pictures from our GK site in Tandang Sora..=p

pacute lahat, and they were supposed to be stolen shot..=p


GK groupmates




Strike a pose..=)




Kevs and Me..




nolwin, me and ralph..





saya noh!=p

i screw up!!

waah.. I completely screw up on my IT102 test today.='( and I feel so bad. I did an all nighter still i screwed up. I wasn't able to answer a single problem properly. Kase naman eh, apply ttruth table to our daily lives daw ba? I can't really see the connection between 3 coins and an effing truth table.='(
Anyway, my only consolation is I did well in the previous test, well, most of them anyways. And lets not include CSlec and lab there. Waah, there is something to be sad about again.='(. I relly hate link list programming. ='(.
Well, its my rest day today. I have no scheduled exams for tomorrow so I can rest my pounding head for a while. Yatta! And anyway, the last two subjects are not that difficult. Accounting and English.
Huhuhu.. Wish me luck on my IT102 and CS exams.. I dont want to fail them..=(

welcome me back!!!

Wow! It was ages ago since my last post, at bday ko pa un nun, nag-xmas at new year na. Anyway, i've missed posting here in my blog and so much had happen. There is my surprise bday party back in october, arabelle's 18th and i was part of the cotillion last november, the paskuhan and my first out of town with my friends this xmas vacation. Hay, dami na talaga nangyare, and of course, JR's bday celebration. Poor me, I wasn't able to go with them to the bar.='(.. Well, there is always a next time.
As of now, I am currently cramming for my practical tests for the whole week and a bunch of homeworks which i cannot understand. Next week will be our prelims week, so as expected the week before prelims is always dubbed as hell week. And so much for crying out loud, I need to say bye-bye now for I still have to study for IT103L.. Hay.. walang katapusang aral.
well, im gonna be posting a photo from Jr's 18th..
it is jhapi, john and me..